its 6 something pm and just came home from the FDR. im freezing like a beetch. i walked around the FDR for 2 hours and like i said, i just wanna sit and think about whats happening. im happy i went to the FDR alone becuase i dont have to deal with any bullshit. i never knew the FDR can be so huge! but they have the most beautiful scenery ever. as i was walking i thought about. i'll stop trying, stop bother you. if your able to give me up and move on, i'll do the same. everythings just not right for us. your like a drug, and its hard to quit but at the end i will be myself again. i admit, this is stupid. im just a little girl. whatever, everyone has these feeling. i cried. even more stupid aint it? when i walked farther down to the FDR, there was a park. with swings ! nobody was there so i decided to go in and just sit in the swings. it was the most relaxed thing i ever felt. i sound like a loner right now but i wanted be alone so i dont give a fuck if your gonna think like that. im not gonna change my decision, everything is final. if everyone wants to be a bitch in my life, i'll be one too. im sick and tired of complaining bout how emotional i am. there were people who cared, thanks. but i bet they dont want to see me this way too. so as i said, thank you for everything. you just keep finding ways to hurt me. but im giving up, you'll just be like how we all started. a stranger. do i want this ? no. but i guess its the best for me to be myself again.
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